A QPR (queerplatonic—sometimes quasiplatonic or quirkyplatonic—relationship), similar to the romantic friendship, is a relationship that rides the messy line between platonic and romantic. While there are many checklists out there for negotiating sexual, kink, and physical touch boundaries, I haven’t seen such a list for the other potential elements of a QPR (though this list can be applied to many other relationship types; it was, however, written with this one in mind). So, I’ve created a list to consider below.
First, Resources:
Romantic Friendship on Wikipedia
Queerplatonic Relationship on LGBTA Wikia
Romantic Friendship on Psychology Wikia
Platonic Life Partners on TVTropes
Heterosexual Life Partners on TVTropes
Checklist
- Gifting to Each Other
- Planning Career/Education Decisions and Changes Together
- Having Mutual Funds
- Having Mutual Assets
- Having Mutual Spaces
- Having Mutual Objects
- Merging Finances/Financial Planning
- Having a Non-Legal Commitment Ceremony
- Cohabitating
- Sharing Political/Religious Views and Activities
- Having/Adopting Children Together
- Sharing Domestic Responsibilities
- Meal Planning Together
- Having Pets Together
- Going on Dates
- Getting Legally Married
- Entering a Legal Domestic Partnership
- Being in a Long Distance Relationship
- Moving Cross Country/Internationally Together
- Sharing Insurance Plans
- Sharing Bills or Subscriptions
- Sharing Social Media Profiles
- Traveling Alone Together
- Granting Power of Attorney
- Mutual Estate/End of Life/Health Care Planning
- Name Changes/Taking Their Last Name
- Having Relationship Signifiers (Wedding Rings, Friendship Bracelets)
- Having a Relationship Exit Plan
- Mutual Gifting to Others
- Having a Relationship Agreement or Contract
- Being In Frequent Contact
- Spending Frequent Time Together
- Being Involved With Each Other’s Families/Other Partners
- Spending Holidays Together
- Celebrating Valentine’s Day
- Celebrating Anniversaries
- Saying “I Love You”
- Saying “I Miss You” When Apart
- Expressing General Gratitude
- Expressing Pride in the Other
- Reading Aloud or Singing to Each Other
- Complimenting Each Other
- Using Endearment or Pet Names
- Showing Virtual Affection (Heart Emojis, *hugs*, etc.)
- Writing Love Letters or Notes
- Going to Couple’s Counseling or Therapy When in Crisis
- Applying Relationship Labels
- Sharing Your Location/Tracking
- Being Public About Your Relationship
- Having Exclusivity Agreements
